MENTAL HEALTH: PART 4 SEVERE DEPRESSION LEAD TO ATTEMPTED SUICIDE.
As I share different stories of different circumstances by different people. I have become aware that mental health is more rampant than it is stated. I have discovered that more people suffer alone in dark corners, feeling unobligated to share their pain because, oh well, nobody really cares. I have also come to learn that some people just want someone to listen, a platform for someone to talk to. As various people have shared their mental health issues to me, most times, I have been inadequate, fallen short of a way to comfort them, but I have tried to be better. That’s all everyone needs in regards to the rising mental health issue, open-minded people who listen.
When I met Tracy, I was quite overwhelmed, seated there in my awkwardness, next to this brilliant looking lady, who was eager to share her mental health story with me. As a teenager, Tracy felt different, she didn’t understand her difference because no one explained it to her. A few years later she fell in love, they say love is all good until it is given to the wrong person. In this case, it was, let’s call him Ben. Tracy loved Ben, she would do anything for him, or for both of them to be happy. She got pregnant, overwhelmed, she shared the news with Ben who in return offered her an abortion.
She went, along with it, Afterall they were in love. Baby number two came along, sad and happy at the same time, his answer was still the same. They got rid of it. It pains to have an abortion, it pains for something to grow inside you, but then take it away because the father does not want it. But you know what pains the most, it’s the constant reminder of your past actions.
After baby number one, Tracy tried her first suicide attempt, she was simply so overwhelmed with the grief. She bought pills, being the smart lady that she is, different doses of pills in different chemists. She booked herself a nice Airbnb and scheduled her calls and text messages for people to reach her after she had died. They got her just in time, took her to the hospital and thereafter she got an informal kind of counseling.
After baby number two, Tracy would occasionally snap, breakdown, no one took these breakdowns seriously. She broke up with Ben, she felt like this was needed for her to have a normal stable life. Life moved on, she hid her feelings, got another boyfriend and he was the one that saw her other side. The side that has no control, the side that constantly breaks down and snaps, he asked her to get help.
Then the second suicide attempt came in, she ordered pills again, this time stronger and “better” scheduled her calls and did it. I believe she meant it more the second time than the first. But then again, they caught her just in time, this is when she was diagnosed with extreme depression. Close people were mad, but still supported her, they got to understand depression with the help of psychologists. Mental illness is just like any other illness and should not be ignored. She went to a mental health center where she stayed for a while, got to meet all sorts of people like her there.
It was a relieve to know that she was not alone, that she was not at all crazy but just sick. She’s better now, simply because she chose to put in the work and has a great support system. People who hold her hand along the way. She wants to take a stand, make people aware of what mental illness is. She has changed so much, always being aware of what is happening in her mind. Knowing her moods, her triggers and being intentional about her mental health care. Her therapist says, there is a little kind of crazy in everyone, one just needs to know how to handle it.
She advises anyone with a thought of suicide to get help because once the idea of suicide pops up and is not properly addressed, it will definitely come back again. It’s like a thief that keeps on planning on when next to steal and in this circumstance, it is your life. She also advises people to talk, not always to be miss goody two shoes who always put the needs of others before their own. Because life is too short, we all have stories to tell and we are not meant to tell other people’s stories but our own.
If you need help, you can always seek help, send me an email, or the other contacts left in the previous blogs. Stay safe, take care of your mind and let us all have mental health.
Have a nice week ahead!